Umbilical cords are still attached to grown ass kids and their parents. Yea, some daddies have them attached to them as well.
"UmbiliKids" is what I call them. These adult kids range in age from 18 - 38, some older, both male and female and there is no specific race. They still depend on mom or dad for 1 or all of the following: food, shelter, clothing, cigarettes, money or contributions to their fabulous life styles.
While they are reaping all the benefits they: Talk shit, make their own house rules, have attitudes and sum Otha dumb shit.
One day as I sat in my office my phone rang, "Riiiing!" "Hello" I said. "My son (who is 28) will be late for his interview, because he overslept," the caller said. Me 0_0 staring at the phone and thinking, "No, his mama, just did not call me!" "Thanks for calling," was my response. When UmbiliKid arrived, he was promptly thanked and excused.
Come on Son, the least you could have done was to call yourself!
UmbiliKids usually have a parent or parents that make a reasonable living and have overindulged the Umbili's as they were growing up. And, as adults the parents have looked for jobs for them, typed resumes, completed apps, bent rules and allowed them to talk shit without repercussion and consequence. And, most have the God awful "Right of entitlement" attitude.
UmbiliKids, work and with their money they: shop, wet their whistles with too much alcohol, smoke weed, snort cocaine indulge in designer drugs (WTF is that you ask: Ecstasy seems to be a very popular one). Most couldn't pass a poly or drug test to save their own Umbili neck!"
They live the life of Riley: They sleep late, take trips, half do chores (if they do any at all), "Shake ya ass watch ya self" in clubs wearing the finest clothes and shoes, before exiting to retrieve their rides from valet to go salivate over lobster pizza at Berri's.
Some UmbiliKids don't even contribute to the house by buying toilet paper to wipe their precious asses or a loaf of bread for their favorite sandwich, which they can count on making with meat their parents have purchased for the Umbili's consumption.
It's not Umbili's fault they act this way, it's the parents fault.
UmbiliKids are not dumb, a lot are educated and degreed up (by either the streets, books or both). My co-workers son has 2 masters degrees and working on a 3rd. He refuses to work, lives in her home off money left by his dad (which she said is almost gone) and plays video games all day. He's 30 something. Oh yea, she said he doesn't even clean up after himself or make his bed and that she does it after her 10 hour work day... GTFOH! The kicker is he brings strange hot girls into her home at night to screw... Uhhh huh
If you are an UmbiliKid and you are reading this and you live at your parent's home, because the economy is bad and you can't find a job to sustain an apartment and everything that comes with being on your own or you just prefer having all your hard earned money to yourself, my advise to you is to: SHUT THE F*#K UP, be nice, kind, smile often, speak in soft tones, buy some toilet paper, pay a light bill and be productive in your parent's home!
Parents, time for reprogramming and cutting the umbilical cord, because we have real.com messes on our hands!
I shake, shiver and convulse thinking UmbiliKids are our future...
"Shake ya ass, watch ya self..."
06/22/11, 0622hrs
